HUNGRY FOR SOMETHING

♥

2012-02-07T21:21:00.000-08:00

i love the way you call me by my name, even though you hardly spelled out my nick
i love it when you called me up by phone, just to clear out issues
i love it when you touch my face before kissing me sweetly
i love it when you whisper lyrics of songs when we go out videoke
i love it when you share stories from you relatives which involves me
i love it when you make plans on introducing me to your family
i love it when you lie your head on my shoulders
i love it when you squeeze my arm like you can't get enough of it
i love it when you hug me from behind
i love it when we slept together (hehe) and let me sleep in your arms
i love it when we kiss in public, sweet
i love it when you shut up when my mood swings
i love it when you remind me to get on the 'diet' thing
i love it when you get naughty
i love it when you say 'i love you' and mean it
i love it when you trust me
i love it when i feel secured on you
i love it when you say i am beautiful despite the sweat

and i love the me, when i am with you
i love you michael

GET HIGH ON ♥

2012-01-22T06:48:00.000-08:00

It's the first month of 2012, and i think i am really into it. It kinda made me think if this is going to work out. Then i recall what I've promised to myself last year, "NEVER LOOK FOR LOVE THIS 2012...LET IT BE"

And then, there you are. Owning a broken heart.
oooohhh boy, i'm so into you, let's not take it in a rush and please,
could it be you now? ♥

WHAT IS THE COLOR OF LOVE ?

2011-12-19T06:02:00.000-08:00

It’s a gloomy Saturday morning for me. The day after the “return of the bad girl”. I can’t help thinking where, how it started and who cause me to act this way. All I can remember is I’ve been doing this for how many years, keep doing things all over again, reflecting, having regrets, crying… and yet booom, here I go again.

Last night was terrible. But i don’t know if it equates to the awful experiences I had before, I mean the emotion. I guess before was the worst thing (half dead caused by the most beautiful person whom I wanted to share my life with), but I don’t remember the feelings then. Last night was totally empty, like I wanted to go somewhere else, in a jam-packed room, a busy crowded place where people tend to enjoy life like they don’t have any tomorrow. The music echoes in every wall of the room, and you feel like dancing like a pro. Drinks are everywhere, and spilling it out just to feel like doing it. And everyone is happy, except me. And in the middle of nowhere, I find myself buying a chocolate drink in a local store with a mind floating. Like what they say, chocolates are good for desperate people, but as soon as I emptied mine, damn nothing change.

I’M SO HIGH. Right at this moment. I wanna feel like dancing and dancing and dancing. (on track: Baby It’s You, Jojo)

---------------ooo-----------------------ooo-----------------------ooo----------------ooo

...DARN !!! that was outdated. more than two weeks ago. HAHA!

i'm about to start writing and planning my life (again and again and again 10000x1000) but as soon i wanted to write stuffs here, i go back to the sofa and better watch tv shows than reminiscing those shitloads things (sorry on that). it's better for me not to plan things... that might work.

this year was a blast. really. from places i wanted to go (two out of the many), to the boys i wanted to own (betch, haha!) and yeah, the only thing left was me and my silly broken heart. from D - who i thought would be my dreamlover, to A - who never showed up the next day and G - who would marry me unless i loose weight. HAHA. ooohh boys, spare me. but atleast, i wouldn't anymore be daydreaming and building futures with you [[: and atleast, you contributed something in me, you jerk!

I JUST WANTED TO BE HAPPY AND I DON'T WANNA BE LONELY [[:

I STILL GO CRAZY

2011-07-04T03:15:00.000-07:00

no, it just AiN'T TRUE :[[

i hate karaoke, i hate love songs, the one with "i get lost in your eyes" thing? rawr. i hate hearing guys having good voice. i hate seeing my sun phone. i hate passing tionko st. i hate realizing he's just a few walks away. i hate looking his facebook page. i hate his name on my phone. i hate imagining his face. i hate this feeling and the most, i hate him.

HUSH... just now, just now !!!

I HAVE TO...

2011-06-17T01:43:00.000-07:00

i have to write something about

a. my trip to ILOILO

b. my summer vacation 2011

c. my suitors (haha. plural ok?)

d. my work

WOOOOH !!! inspire me please ?!

I WANNA GO SOLO

2011-02-21T04:38:00.000-08:00

THE SECOND TIME I WENT TO CEBU, i was alone. But that doesn't mean somethings wrong. The real thing was only to experience the skyride at crown regency where i never had a chance on my first trip (may 2009) with my mom. My second trip was on December 2009. 'twas really a planned vacation sine i have to accompany my sis-in-law, my nephew and niece for their trip to dxb. Since it was a DVO-CBU-DXB trip, might as well spent the rest of the days at cebu, again, ALONE.. I had a real good time for 3 days. I was able to experience and understand the beauty of being alone in a place where i was so clueless, planning a day and even arguing with myself which way to go, haha. darn! It was fun really. Even got frightened hearing an explosive while walking the city streets realizing later on that it was Christmas Season, and firecrackers here are not banned. Oooh poor dabawena. lols!

AND THAT'S WHEN my idea of traveling alone came. It was such a fool and fun idea. But who else could appreciate it but only those people who could experience it, right? Well, im planning to have this "FOOLISH TRIP" as what i call this, once a year.

NOW, here i go again. Another trip, another adventure. Excited but not that much to avoid conflicts on schedules (though my tickets are all set). Another 3 days to spend with myself. ILOILO, oooh for how many years (starting 2003) of wishing to be on your comfort, well i'll see you in few more days.

TREAT ME WELL, OK?

New Ways of Learning

2010-11-22T21:30:00.000-08:00

Formal education is facing a formidable challenge in adapting to a media-saturated environment, in which traditional schooling methods are obsolete or irrelevant. Instead of assisting students in memorizing facts about the world or information storage, modern education should impart higher-order thinking skills such as analyzing and evaluating an overwhelming amount of information that is usually just a few clicks away. (Thoman and Jolls, 2005)

reference:

http://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Why_is_Media_Literacy_Important

sentimientos

2010-11-22T21:05:00.000-08:00

♥▬▬ ♥ ▬▬♥▬▬ ♥

y luego pensé que no sería
extraño que tiene un novio,
pero no hasta que me besó la mano

and then i thought

i wouldn't miss having a boyfriend,
but not until he kissed my hand

....

2010-08-14T23:10:00.000-07:00

as long as ii know how

to LOVE

ii know ii stay ALIVE!!!

(i.will.survive)

kina-CAREER

2010-06-10T00:34:00.000-07:00

...and then i thought this was all some sort of "easy.to.do.job" well actually, 50-50.
again unemployed wasn't in my vocabulary.
but instead got loaded (for me) with the subjects.
Now, here's my sched, and we'll see how will you deal with it if you were me [[:

MWF:
8:00-9:00am LINEAR ALGEBRA
9:00-10:00am COLLEGE ALGEBRA
10:00-7:00pm BREAK
7:00-8:00pm COLLEGE ALGEBRA

TTH:
8:30-10:00am APPLIED MATH FOR TECH.
10:30-12:00nn COLLEGE ALGEBRA
12:00-5:00pm BREAK
5:00-6:30pm COLLEGE ALGEBRA

SEE? too much for the break time.
too much [[: well, i should get start adjusting with it or else,
become unemployed, ugly and desperate.

"half day lang pud ko. im all yours" - g.a.b

(haha. you migi. you naughty)

BUZZY. beezie. BOOZZY

2010-05-03T17:57:00.000-07:00

APRIL 27-30, 2010
my father's own definition of "sentimental tour". well, we had our summer vacation at tandag, surigao del sur, and for me, my 23rd (forever) birthday celebration [[: fun.fun.fun

APRIL 30, 2010
axl's 7th birthday. [[: iloveube

MAY 2, 2010
again, axl's mcdo kiddie crew graduation. congratz

MAY 3, 2010
kuya dondon's 31st birthday celebration [[: yepeiii yebert.

OOOoooOOOOoooOOOOoooOOOOoooOOOoooOOOoooOOO

BUZZY. BEEZIE. BOOZZY
...and really it turned out to be my SUMMER [[:
...done with 2 out of 8 DO'S in 2010
...MORE to come [[:

NEXT PLEASE...

2010-03-07T05:52:00.000-08:00

bitterness is next to ugliness

again, as far as i can remember how i curse "her" name, how i plan to get "her" out on this world, how "she" met me, and how i met "her" with "him", then looking back seems so difficult to understand. oh well, this was caused by viewing the other woman's fs profile. well, basically, his woman. his forever. betch!

yeah. i knew it. the day i learned, the day he confessed, the day we tried and the day the forever end.

and you LVFM, here's for you.
5 years ago, just seems 5 days ago.
YOU, you sh*t. you assh*le, my assh*ole.
imissyou.stillmissingyou.beenmissingyou.
and i, i still like you, but really don't need you!

STRESS-FREE week

2010-03-04T16:24:00.000-08:00

GREAT reward for all the things i made out last week. STRESS-FREE week. Nothing to worry about, especially tomorrows (masteral) class. NO REPORT (no stress on engr. junio's presentation tomz), NO EXAM (well, for calculus that would be a take-home and for number theory, next saturday would be).

WELL, no worries but then so much to think about. Like the things i wanted to buy for my salary (i.see.k's), Despidida (tama ba spelling?) with Maan and Percy, Retreat (haha) with my Wonderz and plan for my birthday coz i'll be celebrating it at Tandag.

SPEAKING of salary, i wonder what papa would ask if he saw my check only for Php23,200. haha. less Php800. "eh kasi naman absenot ako" HAHAiiZ. gotta do something with it. 800 is 800. I can have a bleach spa on that money. Gee! and that would be the first [[:

YOU and the MASSAGE

2010-02-20T07:51:00.000-08:00

o2.19.2o1o

AFTER perfectly one week of the "first-time-after-more-than-a-decade" meet up, we met again. YOU, trying to console this sober heart which tries to disguise from somebody else's heart. 2 beers are enough to burst the ache deep inside me and though i expect of much sensible thoughts you'll have to brought up, quite disappointed, but then... BLISSFUL as i am, smelling your scent again.

o2.20.2010

JUST before expecting to have a double double time for my masteral subjects today, well it turned out i had only one class for the 10hours of staying at school. weew! but then, reward is just at the corner. after having class at the 5th floor of engineering bldg. (well, i just take a seat and read my adele parks book), momee and i went window shopping at victo then directly head at K1 for a massage. NICE... indeed relaxing [[:

I STILL SMELL HIM...

2010-02-17T17:19:00.000-08:00

...ON the hanky he gave me o2.12.10 friday night.

everynight, off to bed
taking a smell
in the hanky on my head.

it smells like you,
it smells like me.
but there's no US,
REALLY ♥

credit: to my bestbud since prep g.a.b

10 THINGS TO DO IN 2010

2010-02-16T04:48:00.000-08:00

happy new year and yes indeed a love love love 2010. i guess too late for my greetings [[: still hoping 2010 would deal me a smooth sailing career and hopefully the "love life" [[:

and since this is my first 2010 blog. just come up with my "10 things to do in 2010". so friends and family and whoever you might be, please if you have something to contribute on my list, don't hesitate to contact me [[: a'ryt kiddo???!

"10 THINGS TO DO IN 2010"
(subject to change without prior notice. haha)

(1) own a digital camera
♥ yes. sony cybershot.

(2) vacation at tandag, surigao del sur
♥ this april sabi ni papa

(3) learn to drive the pick-up
♥ i don't need a driving school and indeed "ako'y naghihirap na sa kamahalan ng gasolina kay yellow".

(4) finish my masteral degree
♥ that would be this summer or the 1st sem of s.y 2010-2011 [[:

(5) iloilo/bohol vacation or DUBAi much love
♥ could be on my own, friends company or someone else [[:

(6) 70 kgs weight
♥ hopefully

(7) curly hair please
♥ yes. di ako magpapagupit until the june of this year, and then the curly. bahala si papa [[:

(8) soon.

(9) soon.
(10) soon.

2009-09-19T05:54:00.001-07:00

Changes are expected in your romantic goals today, Taurus, and this may involve endings and beginnings for you. Whether you are single or attached, a little break may be required for you today, in the form of a time out, or even a relationship ending. Instead of viewing this as an end to something good, consider this as an opportunity to let go of something that has not been working, and no longer has a positive purpose in your life. You are best when you are emotionally satisfied, and if you have not been receiving that in love, it is time to move on, and you will be better for it

SENSELESS

2009-09-18T18:09:00.000-07:00

i miss writing here.
i miss my senseless side. haha.
later babe, later [[:

iT FEELS GOOD TO WRiTE

2009-08-15T06:26:00.000-07:00

"He’s unavailable. And he’s a cheater! He’s nothing but a lifetime of unkept promises and heartache and oh, did I mention he’s a CHEATING PIECE OF CRAP. Tell me again why you want that, when you could have a man’s full attention, love, and heart?"

So here I wait--for my UNmarried man. I take it day by day and I need to work on the sadness I feel. While it feels as if I’m in mourning, there are no real tears right now. I sit back and observe that in shock. No tears? But there is a sense of a hollow heart, a bottomless pit in my stomach that is not going away. I'm beginning to love him. but I also love myself enough to finally let him go. While I intend for him to take action, I also know that I have no control over those results. So I wait.

I'm worthy of someone
... someone available.

WiSHLiST

2009-08-13T00:31:00.000-07:00

♫ tweety clock
♫ tweety hotdog
♫ total sauna
♫ P1i / e61 / e71- ERASE
♫ new pantz
♫ radio player (for my room)
♫ blouse
♫ cp for sun (ordinary one)
♫ lingerie
♫ contax
♫ vs vanilla lace
♫ check-upz - DONE
♫ goodliness
♫ digicam sm
♫ havz (3)
♫ soap beauty box
♫ umbrella
♫ shoes parisian sm
♫

...that's all folkz [[:

nalilito nahihilo

2009-08-11T20:28:00.000-07:00

gusto kong magsulat ng hindi ko alam.

sabog ba ako? o mas sabog siya?

...bow!

OLDiEZ THOUGHTS

2009-08-11T01:55:00.000-07:00

written: JULY 31, 2009
posted: August 11, 2009 (ooopz. tamad strikes again.)

it's my "mylabz" birthday. weew, but no party tonight for us. haha. She'll (yes babe, she's a she) be celebrating her 23rd inhaling-and-exhaling-on-earth with her family. but we had this kinda plan for tomorrow. We'll see.

Anyways, carlo en I broke up. Haha (are we on a relationship pala? Akalain mo) lmao. But then, that's not the issue, the thing is we're still exchanging messages as "musta?" thingy and it's odd. See? We had 3 break ups. 1st was year 2004, 2nd year 2007 and 3rd year 2009. And after those 1st and 2nd breakups, we don't ussually have these scenarios. Nevertheless it's not really a BIG issue for me, I was just, uggghhh. I was... I dunno. Ka-artihan lang talaga umaatake.

MARLON LEGANADA - oooh that boi with thick hair, chinito eyes, slender figure and not-so-good 5th grader attitude. haha. Yes. He was a friend way back 1998. And we met up again for almost 10 years. Thanks Facebook. I missed him. A lot had been changed. So much. ANd he's actually exited on reading my silly judgement on our ex schoolmates. haha. And i've been much exited on reading his whereabouts now.

paita

2009-08-01T05:06:00.000-07:00

ybiangz took the whats the first letter of the person you'll fall in love with? quiz and the result is C

The one your looking for starts with a C!

They may be an asshole but they're your asshole.

just another bitter

2009-07-25T07:06:00.000-07:00

Remember what I told you that I'm ok now? Guess what? Uh huh. I've been ok since then. I've been ok since I realize (after 2 years, haha) that I don't deserve someone like you. That it's ok if you have numerous bitches and that is none of my business to interfere all your extra eff'in doings. That there's no US, really.

See? It's just a matter of acceptance and realization. haha. Now I can have that "haha". Well, I can divert the "thoughts of you" to "thinking-something-else".

I wouldn't miss it for the nth time, carlo. But you'll always be my all time favorite crush. You still make me smile due to your not-25-year-old-attitude. haha. You silly asshole. But you're cute when you tease me. Yeah, maybe that's all we ever could be, that's all you could ever be "my favorite ex-bf-crush"

see you when i see you.

note: we're still dating --->> as FRiENDZ.

REALLY

2009-07-19T03:42:00.000-07:00

ybiangz just took the "How to know if your boyfriend still loves you?" quiz and the result is he does not love you and is probably using you.

Problems can creep in when you start to have thoughts of “do I love him more than he loves me?” You start examining all the things you do for your lover. For example, all the ways you express your love and how much time and energy you’re putting into the relationship. Then based on his or her actions you notice that your lover is not giving an equal amount back. When you try to commit your partner tends to start to back away from the relationship. But yet in your mind you don't want to love more than your partner loves. You should become fearful that if you love him or her more than they love you, you might be played for a fool.

++ even the fb's quiz result's just right for me.

"if you love somebody then you don't have any interest in being with somebody else."

++ guess what? i'm so ok now

[[: REALLY!!!

SAD TRiiP

2009-07-18T07:22:00.000-07:00

July 17, 2009

This just another testimony on how we'll i'm good on being bare.

I hate. But not as much as I hate myself for not being so courageous enough to rebuff him. Everytime he gave me that look (the one that causes those eff'in bitches to lose control on their faculties), I can't help but kiss him and kick him at the same time.

Watta eff'. It's been 2 years (and more) but the nightmare keeps on and on. A sweet nightmare I loved to dream. A nightmare I don't want to wake up to. Buxet!

The anger that had been slashing at my insides still linger. I am empty. It came to a point when my cousin keep on talking about the day's event, there I am, driving on a busy Friday night, smelling his perfume on my hand, and thinking what an asshole he had been. uggh.

It was as if someone had turned out the light and i was plunged into this black mood. i can't cry. i can't produce tears. But I wanted too and really trying. All i can do is shout (in silence) and curse myself. ooh super curse.

When I came to, I realize to my relief that it was the same thing that happened to me since then. And I don't wanna ask why, I might loose my mind.

For as long as anyone can remember, I keep on promising, to the nth time. I'm dying to change. Eager. Ready. When will i gain enough determination (ow i remember this line). Seriously, maybe why it keeps haunting me (really haunts) because I never did well. I never learn.

OH GOD! HHEELLLPPPP MMMMEEEE.

I wanna have amnesia. Badly.

July 18, 2009

I feel somewhat better, but I still think I'm loosing it.

iTS COMPLiCATED

2009-07-09T19:03:00.000-07:00

after 2 years 7 months en a couple of days, he's back again in the long run... Back again in my life. maybe he's the best description of "TECHNiCALLY HE'S NOT MiNE" thinggy.

silly but then i'm a lil bit affected because if it was that much, well, if it was a strong urge of non-recovery and not-over-you scenario, then maybe i'm crying right now.

Oh well, it's a sort of getting emotional minus the tears. hehe. now that's a "smile".

and what's the worst than this? I could see Him, only Him, even when i'm all alone here.

my bad.

"He was mine but never really.
I never really had Him.
So i never really lost Him.

I guess this is how we'll always be.
I had Him
He had me
But then again,
There's no
US...

really."

TALKiiNG NONSENSE

2009-07-01T20:33:00.000-07:00

i just had a very painful tuesday due to a not-so-tragic event.
ingrown babe, it's ingrown.

ow well, that is.

STUCKED

2009-06-26T03:27:00.000-07:00

ow well, stuck here at "tata benitos"
[coffee shop here at obrero]

haiiz. raining as is.

me alone en my 80z cappucino.

SEEiNG $$$ AGAiiN

2009-06-16T03:43:00.000-07:00

note: just using dollar sign instead of a Php sign [Php sign cannot be found]

Just got lucky. i'll be starting my new (not new on me) work tomorrow. USeP called up. see? my prayers were answered. i'll be teaching College Algebra for two classes. one is at 5.00pm-6.oopm and the other is 7.oopm-8.oopm. basically, i have one hour (6.oopm-7.oopm) free time.

Exited but not as much as my friends are [pempem en ata]. they'll be getting a havaianas gift from me on december as promised. haha.

anywayz, as papa told me:

"magseryoso naka kay pait jud ng tao
nga walay kwarta.
magtarong naka.
dili magcge ug laag.."
blah blah.

YES PA. GOT iiT.

thank you Lord. thankz ma en pa. thankz everyone!!!.

+unexplained happiness.

i LiKE U, BUT i REALLY WANT HiM

2009-06-15T06:00:00.000-07:00

haha. don't mind the title. boredom strikez me.

i guess yea, i guess. haiiz.
i missed him, and it's bad to miss him.
ugggghh. ok ok. i don't miss him anymore.
haha. silly.

better lay back to bed. tweetwimz everyone [[:

SO BiTTER

2009-06-07T05:21:00.000-07:00

1. no work.
2. no lovelife.

pagka pait (so bitter)

the main reason for number 1 is that, usep's enrollment is still going on and loading of subjects are not yet done. so basically, rest for me and wait for a call. (hope to get a call).

here we go now, for number 2's main reason, is simply it's "BY CHOiCE", (i had suitors, mind you. haha.) but then, uggghhh, where's my fvcking superhuman. is HE lost now?

(so out of the topic)
i wanna buy these stuffz soon:

♫ tweety cloth for curtainz, pillowcase en bedsheet
♫ divider for stuffz
♫ pantz
♫ se p1i
♫ trip to bohol (oww)

SHUDA COULDA WOULDA

2009-05-12T05:27:00.000-07:00

and i guess it would not happen this way again.

not now. ughhh.

he likes me.

no biig deal (he's the big one. hehe)

it's just like. period.

c'mon. affected ko? haha. silly.

ako pa?.

[[:

BURP BURP DAY [[:

2009-05-08T05:42:00.000-07:00

im 22.
a lot better from before.
tried to control. tri ed to chan ge.

had celebrated it with a dinner bash with my closest friends.

and a party the morning with my loyal highschool buddies.

xot everyone [[:

FiFi'z NEW TRiiX

2009-04-17T19:48:00.000-07:00

1st timer sa cot

2009-04-17T19:42:00.000-07:00

yes. i've been to cot na [:
passed 7 rivers just to get to the site.
but all worth it.

OVER LOVED

2009-04-02T06:13:00.000-07:00

I need to find somebody who can't sleep at night
Without holding me without holding me tight
I want someone who sees me all the time in their dreams
And then wakes up thinking just of me
Spent time on my own
Spent time being free
Now I just wanna be

Overloved
Over needed
Over wanted
Over missed when I'm away
Overloved
Over dreamed of
Over cared about
Over everything
I'd give anything to be overloved

I want someone who can't wait to kiss me again
Even though it's been a minute since they last did
Want someone who loves love songs
And dedicates them to me
And two loving arms never out of reach
Been fine all alone
Did fine being free
This time I wanna be
This time I wanna be

Overloved
Over needed
Over wanted
Over missed when I'm away
Overloved
Over dreamed of
Over cared about
Over everything
I'd give anything to be overloved

Want someone to talk to me with talk so sweet
Want someone who's there to share their world with me
I've been too lonely for too many nights
This time I need someone here in my life
This time I want someone holding me tight
Been under kissed, under touched
Now I just wanna be

Overloved
Over needed
Over wanted
Over missed when I'm away
Overloved
Over dreamed of
Over cared about
Over everything
I'd give anything to be overloved

I just wanna be
Overloved
By someone who's over in love with me
Overloved
Over kissed over touched
Oh I just wanna be overloved

B A N K R U P T

2009-03-30T23:07:00.000-07:00

the day when my hands itch, it never left since then, untill now.

still craving. ughhhh. when will this agony be gone?

$$$$ where are you now?

back to you

2009-03-29T21:46:00.000-07:00

im so not into over with my n73 phone.

all my money (saved from HCM work) were all spent for it.
then on september 2008, *boom* disappear. haiiz.

and now, i got a new one. haha.
bitterness is done. just loved my phone

[: credit to my dad
who gave me his n70 for me to use and sell [:

$ $ $ $

2009-03-26T06:30:00.000-07:00

im done, and my hands kinda itch. haha.

im seeing
money [:

GRIEVING HEART

2009-03-24T02:04:00.000-07:00

since the wake of dingding's father were already here in mintal, i got the chance to visit and stayed till morning for 3 day straight. and of course, since dingding and i were a lil bit missed of each other (ooh, i miss her a lot) we had a long night to talk stuffz just like what we did before.

on the 1st night, we left about 4am of that. Melody, Grace, Dingding and I had a zip of 1 case of rh (in which, dingding and i only drunk those 6 grandes'. DRUNKEN) plus the pulutan thinggy. not to mention the laugh trip thoughts.

on the 2nd night, Maiva only stayed for about 1hour and then leave. So only, Kuya Pax, Gonyong, Dingding, Melody, Grace and I were left. we stayed till 3.30 am, but still, DRUNKEN.

on the 3rd night was the last night of the wake. I was still present but i had Diane, Sheena and Janjan on the group. what do you expect, DRUNKEN, and left 5am.

on march 25, yesterday, was the internment of tito jerry at mintal public cemetery. it was also his 46 birthday. Dingding, Maiva and I went downtown afternoon of that and gone bonding a lil bit and then went home.

im sure dingding will miss her father, but then, how can you comfort a grieving heart?

R.I.P tito JERRY

2009-03-24T01:57:00.000-07:00

dingding'z father died last March 13, 2009 due to a motor accident. it was definitely a heart breaking incident. At a young of 45 he had gone and had left dingding, ateng and dingding's mother.

May our good Lord guide tito Jerry on his way to our Father.
AMEN!

untitled

2009-03-17T20:08:00.000-07:00

have you ever felt how it feel to be thrown in the pool when its only 3 ft high?

see how stupidity and expectation collide and strikes you at the same time.

uggghhh. mag bisaya ko kay di nako mapagawas tanan kung mag english. ako'y buset ng buset at marami pang buset. see?

i liked him before the clash and the tanduay thing.
i liked him before he drove my car
i liked him before he waits me to get back to myself again
i liked him before he texted me the morning of that
i liked him before he bacame my "pugee"
i liked him before the rostitas with his friends
i liked him before the "kaya pa nimo?"
i liked him before he wanted to be my driver

and

i liked him before, there's no chance of...

HE LiKiNG ME.

[: may nalang jud. ako si ako. better lay back and think...

everything will be alright without him
but the taste of rh will be the same without him
that i can drove home without him
my friends will still be my friends without him
i can get back to myself without him
happiness is spelled without him
inbox will still be inbox without him
my phonebook won't look lost something without him
i can sing without him
el rio is still el rio without him
uic will still be uic without him

and

everyday is still a "party the morning"...

WITHOUT HIM.

much has been said. much of him. much of me.

credit to: o9__2144259

REUNiTED en it feels so good

2009-03-17T19:30:00.000-07:00

march 14, 2oo9

it was a (late) celebration for axel's 3rd birthday party. anyways, it wasn't intended for axel and his friends, but rather for his MAMEE (spelled by maiva) and his MAMEE'S friends. haha. party the morning [:

march 15, 2oo9

about 2.oo am
...twas the first time my #1 labz laid his lips on my cheek. haha. purfect [:

about 2.3o am
...i saw ED again. en i miss him a lot [:

about 3.oo am
...realizations. much better now. atleast i know where i must stand and eventually, i can put him away on my existence. bow!

AKALA...

2009-03-11T20:13:00.000-07:00

akala ng lahat mapapagod din ako

mabuti nalang matigas ang aking ulo

♥ oye! boredom.

HE GOT A new SHE

2009-03-10T04:23:00.000-07:00

"naa gud ko ginapanguyaban byang, someday ul know her,
controversial pa karon, hehe"

"taga davao doc xa byang. basta cute,
gwapa and ViRGiN, haha"

"21. taga buhangin, otherside pero ayoz lang
basta happy ko. hehe"

♥ see? he's in love again. wooh. im happy for you, pula.
♥ ako kaya, kanu's na pud? looser mode. haha!.

credit to my #2 labz: CHARLES BARCELONA

iLL BE OVER YOU

2009-03-05T04:14:00.000-08:00

i need inspiration please. ughhhh.
i still have 18 academic units left and a thesis proposal.

haiiz. all efforts for me to become
IVY LYT MAUSISA SUMUGAT M.D.
oha oha !!!
*sigh*

WEEKLONG SCENARiOS

2009-03-03T06:24:00.000-08:00

march 3

SUUNNNOOOOG... yeah, who start the fire? my neighbor'z children. a 3 and a 5 year old babies playing matches, then lit the clothes scattered in their home. too bad. but then, we're still lucky despite of those things happened.

february 27

i wanna be drunk. waah. yeah, after the work, proceed to CAP for the loveflock and tenenenen... getting drunk [: love that? ow i did.

february 24

it was JUNJUN'z beerday bash. oha oha. we had dinner at el rio and then prepare ourselves for the nights celebration. after the videoke thing and a lil zip of rh, we then woop our asses down town. aw'ryt, partee all night loooong.

Oooopzz...

2009-02-21T05:26:00.000-08:00

oh no no!. just when i had my sentimental sorry's and blahblah'z, here i go again...

WHEN WiLL i LEARN?

PERFECTLY iMPERFECT

2009-02-16T19:22:00.000-08:00

realizationz:

"i admit, things were basically on its
proper timing.
but then, i screw it. oh lord, so sorry"

*where would i start?. year o8 has ended, leaving me memories which helps me to grow (vertical, horizontal), stupiid. i thank you for all who've been a part of my o8 dayz [: and for the fvcking boiiz who in one way or another let me feel so insecure, i curse all of you. haha.

*next, o9 now. i still can remember when i asked the above (Lord) not to (atleast not now) give me the perfectly imperfect unknown man for me unless He knows im ready for the next big thing. and ow yeah, the above is so great... "gihatagan lang naman ko niya ug MGA temptation in which i failed to resist"... tsk!.

*and that's my weakness (aside from black chocolates). damn boiiz. when will i gain that? or i was just so hurriedly and uncontrollable to look for someone who would caress my inner longingness. :[ so pathetic. pootek.

*it's been two years (may 07) since i had my officially called "boyfriend". and im afraid that i can't find any more man who would let me feel those holding-handz, kissing-momentz, texting-with-iloveu's and specially the picture-takingz. ooh i miss that. *but then...

"there are things in life that are just not worth rushing,
especially something you wish to last forever"... amen!

acknowledgment...

*friends: always, been part of me. we may out of sight always, but then, memories we had beggining in elementary and highschool were one of the cherished moments i had. iloveuall. till next partee [:

*for my wonderz: who always supports and understand without further question, iloveuxomuch. u knew me well, to accept me enough. mwa.

*for my family: i love you all [:

*for my lord: im sorry. i thank you for those things. for them. for all. im trying my lord, you knew that and i love you.

*to the perfectly imperfect unknown man: ill wait for you. see you when i see you and...

iLOVEYOU

WB ybiangz

2009-02-08T19:12:00.000-08:00

IM NOT THE MOOD... wtf.

musulat qo unya. unya na. kapoie.
i miss here. i miss me. waah!

SAMAKA USA PA

2008-11-16T21:15:00.000-08:00

got new WORK.

♥ en i guess this is what i wanted. (hopefully). ill be teaching college at usep obrero (pabor pabor aii, haha!) for MWF 6.oo-7.oopm. isn't it amazing? haha ☺

uyab uyab tirada

♥ hmmm, what else? well, before the world knew that we had a relationship, it already ended. nah! whathisname? weeeh. breakupz are for looserz. well, i guess i am.

livin it up

♥ single and available. that's what i am. im born with it. gotta live by it ♫

FiRST COME FiRST SERVE

2008-10-16T19:03:00.000-07:00

nah. please don't mind the title. i just had so many realizations and events happening after september 29. and why so i hadn't written any post after that day? TAMAD strikez again.

topic 1:

well, i miss my college life. i miss my classmatez and my fave teacher. i miss the timez when we're so exited about LUNCH BREAK, not because we want to eat, but because of the so-called "CHiKiCHA and TONG'iTZ"..... i remember we even hurriedly ate our lunch just to play cards. haiiz.

the lines...sigh. miss it!.

"galaw galaw para di ma stroke"
"pildi puli ha?"
"oii wa qoi john lloyd dah"
"paksiw na, wa kay balay"
"akoy sunod puli ha?"
"oh baychinkohaii"
"tago kay naay tao"

topic 2:
miss my students @ HCM. haiiz mga anak. miss u. bow!

topic 3:
just got had a new interest. he's a boii anyway. that's it. i just like him. period.

MUCH HAS BEEN SAiiD

2008-09-29T17:29:00.000-07:00

my minds sucks. it has something to do with the blue coated pill. nah. something wasn't right. I've been carrying this excess baggage for almost 11 years and still don't have any idea how to get it out and put it in their very rightful places.

like huh?! always get shocked. pootek. i hate myself (not everyday). it's just i hate me when i'm craving for more. i hate me, seeing wearing those shit full wearables. geeee. when will this end?

i need inspiration please. inspire me.

welcome bb pia

2008-08-31T16:55:00.000-07:00

it's bb pia's christening.

weeeh!. ninang ako.
i met padz kuya louie, fritz, carlo en ehem jc. haha

after our lunch @ kibuwi, proceed to momee em'z crib at el rio.
then drinking session na. from 1pm upto 10pm. haiiz!.

to em-em en maki:
congratz en eiinx for the treat. haha!.
ma good ninang lageh ko,
basta kay kamu na bahala nako kay padz ah?.. wooh!.

to bb pia: lab u nak. mwuah!. dili sa mag lake lake ah? haha.

o8.o8.o8

2008-08-13T08:10:00.000-07:00

this was supposed to be made last 8.8.8
unsaon ta man hubog man. weeh!.

after 48 years gayud nga wa mi nagkita ni jeanlie adovas ,
xa wakas!. drunk @ trickz bar... swerte eu kay re opening. aylabeet. libre fudz weeh =)

hmmm... done wid doz beerz en boiiz. uli 3am. haiiz =)

miss u dhing. puhon na pud aw'ryt =)

Mapangahas si MANGAHAS

2008-07-25T06:21:00.000-07:00

:)

yeah..
that's all i ever could do everytime he enters the gym.
haiiiz.. what's his name?
ataii. haha. plip jud qo dah..

wooh!, nagtapad jud mi ganina sa cardio, haha.
nalipay nako :)

see you tom, mangahas

WORKiNG THiNGZ OUT

2008-07-16T00:46:00.000-07:00

first day of working things out.
well, i had a great time

with all the evaluation,

meeting chris,

the 2hours sweating session,

the bath

and hell yeah the blower.

...kaya lageh ni =)
goodluck biangz

best weekend

2008-07-14T07:09:00.000-07:00

july 12.2oo8

after 1 month en two days two be exact, again SSC & NAB made out another gig for d G side. wholatta fun. but then, i had a 6o-4o happee experiences. wooh! as expected, i saw him again. ughh! drifting away baby. haiiz..

july 13.2oo8

2am out of nautica bar but instead hang out wid my studentz before. wooh!!. 5.oo am went home.
5.3o, 3o minutes of ride, papa juz welcome me wid a smile "naku, sayu jud ka naka uli, sayu sa buntag"... waah,. iloveit =)

6.oo am, again 3o minutes of sleep, dressed up en ride again d car. going to d beach baby. tiiiippzzzzzyyyy much. but then, beach is d only cure dat time aside from too much intake of food,. haha.

ah.lab.my.weekend.xo.much.

Fuck The Code - WANTED

2008-07-05T07:47:00.000-07:00

...bad title

yeah wadeber.. its one of the lines in the movie...
hell yeah! i do love the movie. the twist, the actionz, the humor en oohh boii, the cast..
wooh xo hot..

well, enuf of it.. nyt everyone =)

How To Make A Love Song

2008-07-04T05:44:00.000-07:00

The 1st part of this song, I guess
Should start with something sweet
Cause lovesongs often do ,and you know
Me, i'm such a geek
For songs that I can sing to you
And I'm hoping this could be one
And I hope that you would like
Me...este...like it when i'm done

The 2nd part is easy to mess up with
Somethng cheesy
So I better choose my words cause I
Don't want it to be mushy...
Coz' that's the thing with lovesongs
And that's the tricky part
It's hard not to sound corny when you're
Singing from the heart

And when the chorus comes, I must come up
With something clever
Cuz For you it's just a lovesong but for me
It's now or never!
And though I tried my best to make it
Beautiful and true
I Could Never Make A Song As

Beautiful As You...

...well, i wonder how this song is made up?.. ughhh!.. matagal na ba etong kantang to??.. haiiz., juz love it (second to one and only you)..

Pretty Scared

2008-07-03T20:16:00.000-07:00

im pretty en a lil bit scared

...i dunno what to write., its juz my conscience ask me to., well, not bad twaz june since my last entry hir. wotz new?! ...yeah,. twaz fun. chasing with emotions. drifting away from someone! wooh,. i lurv it en im hapi with the outcome. i dunno why i had that title "pretty scared" nywez, it juz pop into my mind,. haha! plip. ...still, no job! haha., well, enuf of me., ughhh., bored!

CROSSiNG THE "friend zone"

2008-06-07T02:14:00.000-07:00

You've had feelings for your friend for a while and you're worried about crossing the line and ruining the friendship. That's not really true, of course, but that's what you keep telling yourself so you can justify not putting yourself on the line and risking rejection.

Sure -- it's possible to love a friend of the opposite sex without picturing him or her in bed. Having feelings for your friend doesn't necessarily prove Harry's theory in "When Harry Met Sally" who famously declared that "No man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her."

There are exceptions to Harry's rule, but one thing is certain -- being seen as just a friend by all the people you want to date can be frustrating. So here are a few ways to prevent being stuck in (cue scary music): 'The Friend Zone':

1. Do Flirt

It's okay if romance is on your brain when you greet your friend. In fact, it can fuel the chemistry. It's good for your friend to catch you subtly checking him or her out. As long as you're not drooling or gawking, it can be sexy. You want your friend to think he or she imagined the look. Light touching and sincere and specific compliments are great for flirting, too.

2. Don't Be the Problem Solver

Are you on speed dial every time your friend needs something fixed or wants to process a bad relationship? It's nice to help your friend occasionally, but make sure you're not the one he or she associates with problems.

If you do come over to help, mention that you're happy to assist for an hour but have plans after that. Better to remain a little mysterious and have your friend wondering who else is getting your attention.

3. Have Fun

Create unique memories. You're aware of your friend's passions, so initiate fun and interesting activities that you know your friend will enjoy but isn't doing with others.

And -- if someone has dumped you, confide in a friend you don't have feelings for! Remember to keep an upbeat attitude and stay confident -- those are two of the most attractive qualities cited by singles when looking for a mate.

Of course, not every friendship ends with a romantic happy ending and you may have to be prepared that your crush just wants to stay your friend. You'll have to decide if that's enough for you.

from: What's the best way to let someone know you like them more than a friend? Andrea Syrtash gets answers from daters

so CLOSE, yet so FAR

2008-06-06T21:17:00.000-07:00

June 5, 2oo8, from 8pm till 6am

—I wuz juz beside him

Ja kno what’s holding me not to have a relationship with him? It’s the thought of loosing the so called "friendship" which has been formed for almost 9years.. Haiiiz… *lab nako xa, *lab pud daw ko niya., lab lab nalang mi ani,. Haha!!

“sa heart jud center,wow! Hehe.bitaw tinuod kaau na. d na atik byang. Hmpf.mwah”

-lablayp

…lange-a oii. .

HE’S BAD… dutz why he meanz to me

*lab – lab gud na feeling nimu lab, pero dili dei,. Ing-ana gud

ONE EN ONLY YOU

2008-06-02T19:43:00.000-07:00

oNe & oNLY You!

It took one look

And forever laid out in front of me

One smile and I died

But I do need to be revived by you

There i was

Thought i had everything figured out

Just goes to show just how much i know

'bout the way life plays out...

I take one step away

When i find myself coming back to you

My one and only, one and only you...ooh...

Now i know

That i know not a thing at all

Except the fact that i am yours

And that you are mine

They told me that it wouldn't be easy

And i know

That i am not the one to complain...

...this song was like an eye and heart opener for me.
that yes, i can never be happy alone.
i mean, it doesn't basically mean i have to be
with someone ( relationship wise )
but i need people to accompany me to be happy.
that's basically it. and also, time will come
that i will also need love.
a kind of love that comes from someone
whom i basically wanna spend the
rest of my life with. im not rushing into it.
i know, it will come. i just know. =)
i pray that God will give me the best gift ever.
whoever he may be.
he'll probably give me the best,
that's why he makes me taste the worst of the worst.
haha. =) seriously now, i wanna be contented soon.
i am broken.
each and everytime i have relationships,
its like, i leave a part of my soul to them.
i basically had five boyfriends,
meaning, i gave 5 parts of my whole
that now makes me broken.

i hope i can find someone who can
fill in the blank space in my heart.

whoever he may be, i love you.